


Trial by Fire

by FrivolousSuits



Category: Suits (US TV)
Genre: Canon Quotes, F/M, Mock Trials
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-24
Updated: 2018-01-24
Packaged: 2019-03-09 00:37:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13469991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrivolousSuits/pseuds/FrivolousSuits
Summary: “Do you love Harvey Specter?”The goddamn question rings in Louis' dreams, and he shoots upright, still sweating and sick, because he knows her answer.





	Trial by Fire

_“Do you love Harvey Specter?”_

It makes Louis sick to ask it, because it’s a cutthroat question. He’s slicing Donna open for the world to see, and it’s even crueler here than it would be with Tanner in a real court. She hedges, clinging to half-truths— “it is not that simple”— and he presses where it hurts them both.

 

_“Do you love him?”_

Harvey has the gall to chase him down and accuse him of doing it for fun, as if he didn’t do it _for_ _Harvey_. As if he didn’t harp on how Donna’s with Harvey all the time, how her work revolves around him, how her _life_ revolves around him to save Harvey, Donna’s Harvey.

 

_“Do you love him, yes or no?”_

Louis is hunched over in the bathroom, clinging to a steady breath, because he can’t have done that, he can’t have pushed further than he ever would for just Harvey. He pushed her and pushed, even as every question made him sicker than it ever would if it was just Harvey at stake. He is dizzy, sick at having done this to that beautiful woman in there, and he tells Harvey in just those words.

 

_“Do you love Harvey Specter?”_

When he dwells on it, running the whole catastrophe through his mind, he comes to hate that word “beautiful,” though of course she is. “Beautiful” ignores “kind” and “giving” and “clever” and “dramatic” and “terrifying” and “awe-inspiring” and “perfect.”

 

“ _Do you love Harvey Specter?”_

The goddamn question rings in his dreams, and he shoots upright, still sweating and sick, because he knows her answer.

 

_“The only way to protect me is to prepare me for what’s coming.”_

Years pass. Donna comes to Louis for work, and for friendship, and now for help because some new opportunist is mad at Harvey and charging at her. He refuses. He tells her to ask Mike or Alex to shred her in this mock trial, because he’s not going personal again—

 

_“No, Louis, I am asking you to do whatever you have to do to protect me again.”_

He hears “again,” and guilt he thought long since gone dissolves.

 

_“I am telling you it’s okay to do it.”_

Louis’ head still recoils from the idea, but his heart pulls him to agree. They are true partners this time, she trusts him with herself. He cannot fail to protect her.

 

_“I really don't care what Harvey did, Louis, because I came to you for help, and you left me high and dry."_

Louis never thought he’d feel sick over _not_ tearing Donna apart in a mock trial, but here they are. They’re trapped and shocked and angry, as if nothing’s changed in the last half-decade. Nothing’s changed, they haven’t learned, they haven’t found any path out of this cycle of _wanting_.

 

 _“Do you love Louis Litt_?”

It’s the same dream, yet not at all, and when Donna gives that same, hesitant non-response he shoots upright, heart pounding, with a dizzying feeling of hope.

**Author's Note:**

> All the quotes are from canon, except the last one.


End file.
